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AuthorTopic: Who Should Pursue Who? (Read 280 times)
Debbi
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Who Should Pursue Who?
« Thread Started on Dec 13, 2004, 9:56am »
Proverbs 18:22 (King James Version)

22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.

It seem to be a new day and a new age. How do you feel about the woman pursuing the man?
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For we know all things work together for good to those who love the Lord and are the called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28
chris1
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Re: Who Should Pursue Who?
« Reply #1 on Dec 13, 2004, 10:39am »
When you say pursue are we talking about asking a man out or showingones self friendly?
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chris1
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Re: Who Should Pursue Who?
« Reply #2 on Dec 13, 2004, 10:40am »
When you say pursue are we talking about asking a man out or showing ones self friendly?

Don't have time to elaborate on it bu t i will come back later.

C
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Debbi
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Re: Who Should Pursue Who?
« Reply #3 on Dec 13, 2004, 10:46am »

The context of this verse pertain to a man whose seeking and finding a wife.

The pursuit would entail one initiating "something" to get to know one another. In this case, one's motive is definitely seeking more than friendship.
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For we know all things work together for good to those who love the Lord and are the called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28
Suge
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Re: Who Should Pursue Who?
« Reply #4 on Dec 13, 2004, 12:31pm »
to some degree I think we all should be seeking to serve God and if in so doing and in fellowship friendships develop that lead to stronger feelings, the parties should allow God to grow their relationship.
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Tit 3:9 & "They that be whole need not a physician, but they that are sick.... I will have mercy, and not sacrifice: I am not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentanance."
Debbi
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Re: Who Should Pursue Who?
« Reply #5 on Dec 13, 2004, 12:56pm »
I agree! There has to be an "order" to obtaining God's favor. It does say seek ye 1st the kingdom of heaven and it's righteousenss and all these other things will be added. Isn't that how Boaz found Ruth?

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For we know all things work together for good to those who love the Lord and are the called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28
Suge
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How do I know God loves me? He sent me to my Boaz!

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Re: Who Should Pursue Who?
« Reply #6 on Dec 13, 2004, 1:33pm »
*looking @ normie*; ;) yes, that is quite true!
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~Normzrib~
Tit 3:9 & "They that be whole need not a physician, but they that are sick.... I will have mercy, and not sacrifice: I am not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentanance."
chris1
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Re: Who Should Pursue Who?
« Reply #7 on Dec 13, 2004, 1:43pm »
This is interesting. My Bishop stated during a discussion with the singles in the church, that just because a woman invites a man to have coffee or to go to a movie does not classify it as her pursuing him.

Just because I ask you to hang out or invite him to something, does not constitue that I want to marry this individual. It just says I am interested in getting to know you.

Truthfully I don't see a problem with asking a guy to hang out. It really depends on the motive of the individual thats asking.

Thats my take on that

C
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Debbi
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Re: Who Should Pursue Who?
« Reply #8 on Dec 13, 2004, 2:14pm »

Quote:


Just because I ask you to hang out or invite him to something, does not constitue that I want to marry this individual. It just says I am interested in getting to know you.


You're right, motive is the entire key! But is this considered pursuing? I've been told by my husband that men don't view platonic friendships like women, considering men are attracted visually and women are attracted emotionally. He said for the most part they don't go out with you one on one unless there has been a visual attraction.

It could be we are from the "old school" (don't you even agree ms. lady ;D chris1). Personally, if I were a single, I could never get up the nerve to ask a man to go to the movie, hang out, dinner, etc... I'd just daydream about it :D, like we used to! Even if I wasn't interested in getting to know him further than "just friendship", I couldn't. Male friends I had were always in group settings and now thru couples or on professional levels. I can't recall any one on one male friendships. Hmmmm guess I am from back in the day!

Whew, Gurl! Thank God for the grace of marriage ;). Things have really changed....
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For we know all things work together for good to those who love the Lord and are the called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28
Shaye
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Re: Who Should Pursue Who?
« Reply #9 on Dec 13, 2004, 2:44pm »
Deb,

I think you're right motive is the key to everything that we do. I am a single femal who has several platonic male friendships. I never ever have asked I guy out on date, I was taught by my Dad that the man is to court the woman, but in society today women are taught to go after what you want, let it be known that you are interested. If we look at Proverbs 18:22 the word findeth means to search or discover and this particular scripture speaks to the men not woman. I don't there is anything wrong with having interest in the opposite sex, just be sure that your motives are pure. Be God lead about any decisions that you make
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For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for welfare, and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11
chris1
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Re: Who Should Pursue Who?
« Reply #10 on Dec 13, 2004, 4:02pm »
One of my best friends is a guy. It is strictly platonic.

It is possible that men and women of God can be platonic. He and I have been friends for about 10 yrs.

But when I decided to hang out with him, it was no other motive than to be friends. and that is the way it has stayed for the 10 yrs. of freindship.

Besides thats the man's hangup if he can't just see it as a friendship ratehr than a date.

C
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